I got this overwhelming feeling in church today that it was time to start the adoption again. Is it? Is it just me wanting it so much? I don't trust my gut much anymore after my last disaster. I don't have enough saved up... that is for sure. My husband is NOT a "do it and God will provide" person. Period. So... right. Even if I want to I am sure he is not ready.
But, It is lighting the fire under my arse. Work starts back in May. We'll see how things are then...
Sunday, March 11, 2012
Wednesday, March 7, 2012
If you're happy and you know it...
OK, I know I have said this before but I PROMISE I am not this grumpy/bitter all the time. This is my outlet so when get pushed to the brink, this is where I vent. BUT, just to prove it I am going to post 25 things in my life that make me happy!
1) My husband was offered a job last week (yay!)
2) I LOVE my job.
3) I love my kids, they are crazy amazing
4) I *think* (don't wanna jinx it) we have found great child care this summer.
5) I have found a passion in running
6) My dog loves me so, she just makes me happy.
7) It was 70* yesterday!!!
8) Means Spring is CLOSE!
9) I love Spring
10) Spring BREAK!!!! We are going NO WHERE but I love having my kids home for a WEEK AND A HALF.
11) I might be homeschooling again... lots of things up in the air right now, but depending on some job things
12) I have lost 10 lbs.
13) I am making friends with my running group. It's been awhile since I made friends
14) My baby just turned 5. Such a big boy. I love him so (did I mention that yet?)
15) The girl and I had some great chats lately. I love that she is getting to the age that we can just "chat". We discussed how girls sometimes pine for boys... and how silly this is. Why would you be sad over a boy who doesn't even LIKE you? Just find one that does like you (for who you are!). That's my girl
16) I finally decided I am ready for a second dog again
17) I love my husband. I am kind sad and lonely now that he is working...
18) I love my house too. It is small and we paid to much for it, but it is MY HOUSE! So I love it.
19) I love my yard. It is small and currently full of dog sh*t, but it is MINE. It has a fence. and I LOVE it.
20) I love my craft room... because, i mean it is a room. For Crafts
21) Pinterest. Nuff said
22) Friends. I have some pretty great ones.
23) This country. For all it's faults... it is an amazing country.
24) I am healthy, my family is healthy. I have 2 very dear friends going though terminal cancer diagnosis with their husbands. They are crazy amazing strong.
25) My future daughters birth mother... who may not even be pregnant yet. But sometime somewhere this woman will have to make the worlds hardest decision for our daughter.
Seeee.... I am not all that bad ;-)
1) My husband was offered a job last week (yay!)
2) I LOVE my job.
3) I love my kids, they are crazy amazing
4) I *think* (don't wanna jinx it) we have found great child care this summer.
5) I have found a passion in running
6) My dog loves me so, she just makes me happy.
7) It was 70* yesterday!!!
8) Means Spring is CLOSE!
9) I love Spring
10) Spring BREAK!!!! We are going NO WHERE but I love having my kids home for a WEEK AND A HALF.
11) I might be homeschooling again... lots of things up in the air right now, but depending on some job things
12) I have lost 10 lbs.
13) I am making friends with my running group. It's been awhile since I made friends
14) My baby just turned 5. Such a big boy. I love him so (did I mention that yet?)
15) The girl and I had some great chats lately. I love that she is getting to the age that we can just "chat". We discussed how girls sometimes pine for boys... and how silly this is. Why would you be sad over a boy who doesn't even LIKE you? Just find one that does like you (for who you are!). That's my girl
16) I finally decided I am ready for a second dog again
17) I love my husband. I am kind sad and lonely now that he is working...
18) I love my house too. It is small and we paid to much for it, but it is MY HOUSE! So I love it.
19) I love my yard. It is small and currently full of dog sh*t, but it is MINE. It has a fence. and I LOVE it.
20) I love my craft room... because, i mean it is a room. For Crafts
21) Pinterest. Nuff said
22) Friends. I have some pretty great ones.
23) This country. For all it's faults... it is an amazing country.
24) I am healthy, my family is healthy. I have 2 very dear friends going though terminal cancer diagnosis with their husbands. They are crazy amazing strong.
25) My future daughters birth mother... who may not even be pregnant yet. But sometime somewhere this woman will have to make the worlds hardest decision for our daughter.
Seeee.... I am not all that bad ;-)
Tuesday, March 6, 2012
Why my heart hurts so much
My family was never supportive of us adoption. That was pretty clear. From the snide comments about how much it costs to adopt and the not so subtle reminder that I am not wealthy... to flat out disowning us by some. And everything in between. In that short month (sad) a year ago (even sadder) when we were actively in the adoption process, no one bothered to ask any questions about things. No.one. Friends did, family did not. And when I had to put everything on hold. I think I got a "sorry" phone call from one family member. And, a voice mail at that.
And, NOT.A WORD. Since. No one asking me if things are going to happen soon. No one checking up on me. No one curious if we even ARE. And that hurts. No one reads this blog either... not even my husband. I mean the very few adoption folks I have made some connections with... now they do. But others, nope. Nice? I don;t know what I expected. Just, participation I guess.
THEN... THEN I had a family member ask if were were going to have another child. Just yesterday. He ASKED me if we wanted a 3rd child. Are.You.For.Real?
And, NOT.A WORD. Since. No one asking me if things are going to happen soon. No one checking up on me. No one curious if we even ARE. And that hurts. No one reads this blog either... not even my husband. I mean the very few adoption folks I have made some connections with... now they do. But others, nope. Nice? I don;t know what I expected. Just, participation I guess.
THEN... THEN I had a family member ask if were were going to have another child. Just yesterday. He ASKED me if we wanted a 3rd child. Are.You.For.Real?
Sunday, March 4, 2012
Do you know any homeschool moms...
That work full time? If so, can you direct them to my blog? I would love to speak with someone..
Wednesday, February 1, 2012
Prayers Please!
Sorry, but I am enlisting an all call. The husband had a second interview this week and we are waiting (excruciatingly, painfully and not at all patiently) for the word. Any word. The time line was "soon" sooooo right. Is soon this week or soon by the next full moon soon?!??!?!
Please just pray for us. And whatever you do please pray for me to have patience. I currently do not posses this trait.
Please just pray for us. And whatever you do please pray for me to have patience. I currently do not posses this trait.
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